Dear Leader and a basket of kittens…
A little girl named Suzy-Moana was standing on the pavement in front of her home.
Next to her was a basket containing a number of tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing FREE KITTENS.
Suddenly a line of big cars pulled up beside her.
Out of the lead car stepped a grinning man.
“Hi there little girl, I’m John Key, the leader of the National Party, what do you have in the basket?” he asked.
“Kittens,” little Suzy-Moana said.
“How old are they?” asked Key
Suzy-Moana replied, “They’re so young, their eyes aren’t even open yet.”
“And what kind of kittens are they?”
“National supporters,” answered Suzy-Moana with a smile.
Key was delighted! As soon as he returned to his car, he called his PR chief and told him about the little girl and the kittens.
Recognizing the perfect photo op, the two of them agreed that he should return the next day; and in front of the assembled media, have the girl talk about her discerning kittens.
So the next day, Suzy-Moana was again standing on the pavement with her basket of “FREE KITTENS,” when another motorcade pulled up, this time followed by vans from BBC, CNN, Sky News, TVNZ, TV3, Radio NZ, NZ Herald, and News-Talk ZB.
Cameras and audio equipment were quickly set up, then Key got out of his limo and walked over to little Suzy-Moana.
“Hello, again,” he said, “I’d love it if you would tell all my friends out there what kind of kittens you’re giving away.”
“Yes Sir,” Suzy-Moana said. “They’re NZ First, Labour, Mana, and Green supporters.”
Taken by surprise, Key stammered, “But…but…yesterday, you told me they were NATIONAL SUPPORTERS.”
Little Suzy-Moana shrugged, smiled, and said,
“I know. But today, they have their eyes open.”
= fs =